The Lost Bite

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It all began a month ago – my first day at Redrop College. I joined the long queue for enrolment when she bounced up to me.

“Hey, there! My name is Nikita and I’m absolutely over the moon to have met you! On behalf of all the Student Leaders, I’d like to be the first to welcome you to Redrop College. Welcome!” she flashed a gleeful grin.

“Darn it. Another one of the chirpy ones?” I thought to myself, but I greeted her and said a thank you. This was one of the reasons I had to move college. I am what you would describe as a reserved person. I value my privacy but, yes, even then – in my previous college – I was a Student Leader. I know, I know, it may seem like a surprise, but coming to think of it, I am just glad to have moved places. Moving away from the prying eyes of vultures was a good idea. People were starting to whisper.

It all began a month ago – my first day at Redrop College. I joined the long queue for enrolment when she bounced up to me.

“Hey, there! My name is Nikita and I’m absolutely over the moon to have met you! On behalf of all the Student Leaders, I’d like to be the first to welcome you to Redrop College. Welcome!” she flashed a gleeful grin.

“Darn it. Another one of the chirpy ones?” I thought to myself, but I greeted her and said a thank you. This was one of the reasons I had to move college. I am what you would describe as a reserved person. I value my privacy but, yes, my situation was as such. I know it may seem like a surprise, but coming to think of it, I am just glad to have moved places. Moving away from the prying eyes of vultures was a good idea. People were starting to whisper.

“Hello, did you hear what I just said?” a voice pierced through my reverie. It was the same Student Leader.

“Yes, of course. Pardon me for day-dreaming. Thank you so much! I am just as excited to be in this college. Are you a senior?” I queried, just to keep the conversation going. In reality, I wish she would just skip by me and move on to someone else instead.

“You don’t want people getting suspicious, do you?” my mind asked. Of course not.

She bounced in front of me again and told me that she was indeed a senior Student Leader and that she would love to explore the college grounds with me when I was done with official enrolment.

My turn arrived and I supplied the admissions staff with my particulars, transcripts and all that jazz. ‘Tis done! I was now officially a freshman of Redrop College!

True enough, Nikita was waiting for me to complete my registration and she bounced up to me and took me by the arm and declared, “Let’s go!”

In all honesty, I just wanted this sprite to just leave me be. I am totally fine with exploring the college grounds by myself. I was not here to make friends! The last thing I wanted to do was make myself known to everyone in college; especially the Student Leaders. It was just Plus, what if could not control my hunger? That would royally mess up my college experience. Even then, necessity is the mother of invention, they say.

“Come on, I’ll show you around!” she exclaimed, grabbing my arm as if I was a new play-thing belonging to a child.

“Thank you,” I replied. With that, we were off to walk around the sprawling campus of the college. Frankly, it was sweltering hot and the sun was blazing in the skies above us. I just wanted to slip out of my black cardigan, but I knew I could not as I would easily suffer a sunburn. Contrary to popular belief, people like me do not burst into flames or perish into dust when under sunlight, but, hey, I was not there to prove anyone wrong.

“I’m Varsen,” I offered, and continued, “I am glad to have met you. I have something… something to ask you, if you don’t mind. What are the people like in this college?” I asked tentatively.

“Oh, hello, Varsen! Glad you told me your name, I was starting to wonder. Yes, Redrop College is one of the premiere colleges in this neighbourhood and we only accept the deserving. As for the people… well, that’s an odd question,” Nikita said, looking at me with curious eyes.

“Damn, don’t blow it,” my mind cautioned. “Of course not, I was merely curious,” I assured her. The next thing I knew, she returned to her chirpy personality and showed me around campus.

The next two weeks flew by in a blur with Nikita by my side when she had the time. For the life of me, I could not see what it was about me that made her stick around. I mean, she had so many other friends before I came along and it was not like I had even half an inch as much spirit as she had.

“Hey, Varsen! Do you maybe want to grab a bite to eat or something tonight?” she asked, bouncing up in front of me.

I smiled to myself. The irony of her words! A “bite” indeed. I mentally kicked myself for that thought. I would not take a bite from anyone! However, I just might bite someone. It has been sometime since I last fed. I rarely feed on humans, like Nikita, and coming to think of it, the need for real food was urgent. The life of cats had been the primary source of sustenance all along. I had to stop that… People were starting to whisper here, too.

Not wanting to blow my cover, I had to keep a straight face and accede to her request. Suppressing a laugh, I asked “Like a date, you mean?”

“Well, yeah. But only if you want to…” she replied. For the first time, I was drawn to the pulsating nerve on the left side of her neck. “A date… indeed…” the thought squirmed in my head. She shook me. “Are you alright?” she asked, concerned.

I nodded my head and said, “Sure, I quite enjoy your company.” It was really silly of me to have agreed but I arranged to meet her at the pizza place near the college at seven that evening.

I say foolishly because I was on a different kind of diet as compared to the rest of the students –no junk food of any kind for me. Even then, cats were, to me, considered to be junk food. It was high time I had some real food!

We were the last ones left in the shop. The meet-up was going well and of course, as far as I was concerned, I only had one real intent in my mind. I would not call it a date as we were clearly on different wavelengths! She wanted to “hang out”, whereas I, on the other hand, was trying to go for a bite!

It took me the strength of a steel gut to hold down the ham and cheese pizza and a glass of cranberry juice I had merely poked at and sipped. Before I knew it, Nikita bounced over to my side and started hugging me. I was so confused that I initially pushed her away. I liked her – of course I did – and the pulsating vein in her neck drew me closer towards her.

Rationally speaking, I should have never let it get this far, but when she slipped off her zippered hoodie and tilted her head to the right side, I lost control. My innate instinct yelled at me to stop. My deeper, darker instinct told me to do what I had to do. I felt powerless at such a command from deep within.

I knew that she was not aware of who I really was,. But when she did that… she was luring me to feed on her. I collapsed and gave in. I was overwhelmed by the desire to drain the living blood out of an innocent girl all because she was flirting with me. I could not stop. I had let our kiss go too far.

Without the shadow of a doubt as to what I had to do, I drove my sharp canines into her neck, gently piercing the skin, drawing out just enough blood. I immediately used my tongue and soothed the area with my saliva, which had healing as well as numbing effect.

When the blood is leaving the body of any victim they tend to feel a sense of comfort. They do not feel the death in a painful way. However, to end her life was never my intent. I merely wanted to… taste her.

Most of my kind, back in the previous college I was in, would have felt utterly no remorse or guilt; but not me. I knew I had to stop. Even then, my body was screaming at me to drink and drink. I had gone two weeks without properly feeding myself.

“Enough!” my mind ordered. With all the will and conscience I had, I licked the puncture wounds on her neck and held her tightly as I walked out of the pizza place.

There was nothing I could do to help her gain conscience. The least I could do was to make it as much painless as I could. Leaving her almost lifeless on the steps outside the shop was undoubtedly one of the hardest things I had ever been compelled to do.

“I will never…” my thoughts wandered. I regained my strength and had to escape this place as fast as I could. I had just drunk the blood of a Student Leader, and if she goes missing, I will be in deep shit. Knowing that she will not have any inkling of a memory of what had just transpired between us, I took run. Never did I look back.

There she laid lifeless, on the dark, dimly-lit steps outside the shop, with two puncture wounds on the left side of her neck, where my sharp fangs had left their deadly marks.

 

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My Dark Lover

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Dark lover of my heart
My want, my need, my desire
They match your own.

My dark deeds
My uncontrollable love
My conscience bleeds.

As my dark feelings rise
From deep within my very being
Your blood, your life, your soul
Sing to mine.

Your love flowing through
My ocean-blue veins
As you lay a kiss on my throat.

I, your angel, fall
As we soar into the night
Of our souls.

With centuries behind us
Tears well in my eyes
As the dawn approaches
Signalling the end
Of yet another night.

I search for the light to my dark
You search for the dark to your light.

Together, we yearn to be free.

I search for the light in your dark
You search for the dark in my light.

Your words of lust
Fall upon my ears
As we soar into the night
Of our souls.

No longer would we breathe
With half a soul.

Your hands caress my skin
As my deep madness
Cause a smile on your lips.

My Sire
My Light
I am not afraid of you.

I never will be
I want your love
I need your love.

I just want to feel
In this dark soul of mine.

~ Tristesse

A Guide To My Life

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I am whole, I am incomplete
I lost a part of myself aeons ago
My heart and soul ache at times
Not with love but, deep within
Something is eating me , alive.
It is a fear of meaninglessness and despair
My dear Life can be cruel but, sometimes
You have to be cruel to be kind, They say.

We are Life’s fools, We are Love’s dolls
I have been fooled and played
For more than a handful
Hurt, bleed, cry and laugh.
Life is but a game, Love is but a doll-parade
Give in, feel the rush, enjoy the show
End my misery, what do I have to give?
Give Life your soul and Love your heart.

~ Tristesse

Shadow of My Vampire (Poetry)

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Your love is like a vampire’s kiss,
No matter how many times you hurt me.
You are mine and I am yours,
That is all that matters to my vampire heart.

To breathe without a spirit,
Is a cruel trick of humanity.
In all honesty I blame no one,
As I wander under the velvety night skies.

Mortals waking and dying,
As I become naught but a survivalist.
Is there an element of truth,
In this distance-bound love?

Here I am deeply longing,
For a sweet drop of your crimson.
You and I Immortals,
Each bound together by our hearts.

I wander this forsaken world,
With my damned deceitful lies.
I beseech the heavens above,
For a moment of blissful salvation.

As I wander this inhumanely lonely world,
Memories of you resonate within strongly.
I shall disappear into the shadows,
As you take my hand in yours.

As the eye-searing light of day dims,
The soft moonlight beneath the heavens shine.
My lonely heart and I will continue our search,
Longingly seeking that elusive vampire shadow of yours.

~ Tristesse

I, Vampire (Poetry)

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I enter the darkness
Unsure of the reason
Why it has me
Under its spell.

The dark it calls
It beckons me
Into the storm
To its beacon of light.

I am drawn to the light
The harbinger of hope
To lost souls in the dark
Just like my volatile emotions.

As I enter the dark
Into the night
Of the wilderness that is my heart
I feel myself change.

My vision is different
My scent is different
My teeth elongate
Into fangs baring themselves for the first time.

I am now one of them
They called out
To my darkness
Ready for my changing.

I am in hunger
For all things sublime
This is my turning
This is my awakening.

My body shivers
It quivers in the cool darkness
Of the velvety night skies
As I become.

I feel solitude
I feel isolation
I feel despair
I feel pain.

It does not feel the same
As it did before
I am now different
I am a creature of the night.

I thirst for the crimson
The very essence of mortal life
As blood drips from my fangs
I hear the call of the dark.

As I continue to walk
In the midst of it all
I, a walker in the dark
I, a Vampire.

~ Tristesse