The being in the Darkness
Is feared by those in the Light
Will I ever find Salvation?
Perhaps when I attain Redemption
For sins committed
A spirit so blasphemous
A mind battling insanity
There is, but, no rest for the Wicked.
The darkness is calling my name
It is luring me in
With memories so haunting
Stop. Just stop.
Facing the Fear, Hatred and Pain
As the Reaper
Embraces me with cold arms
Fear is not an option
For I shall overcome
All that has been committed
And greater than
All that has been given
Finally, Salvation has come for me.


Society and Ignorance

Society is complex. It is everything everything a society should strive not to be – it is patriarchal and misogynistic in nature.

Beings who “feel” the most; the ones who think; the ones who are sensitive; the ones who cry; the ones who feel; the ones who laugh out loud; we are all under siege by a society that never fails to taunt, shun and discriminate us. It may not be about race or skin colour anymore in certain parts of the world, but, our very essence of being a “human” is being waged a war against.

We require countless declaration forms for the mentally ill or physically handicapped. Just because they tick all the “all okay” boxes, does not make them superior to us. They may be the majority, but, we all know that there are so many life-changers in society who have contributed much and played significant roles, despite their mental challenges or handicaps. I cannot, for the life of me, think of anyone at the moment, but, we all know, at some point of our lives, of someone so magnificent whom we cannot do anything, but, admire, awestruck, wondering just how they managed to succeed.

Depression is a killer, if life does not kill you first. Some are diagnosed with so-called high-functioningdisorders, in a category that some of us may fall under. They look, they stare, they wonder what it is like. Some start taking out their religious objects and start praying in fear of being “infected” by our negativity. I do not dwell in negativity. It is just a frame of mind. All these “look at the bright side” stories are just getting on my nerves. They treat us as though what we have is wrong. The worst occasions are when they start correcting us and say things like, “You have to change your character first, to make it in life.

My character?! Perhaps it is you, ignoramus, who needs to be put under therapy for your blatant ignorance! Now, now, no one is getting all defensive. I am merely stating a fact here. What has my character possibly have to do anything with whatever that is making me feel all melancholic, hopeless and in despair, most of the time?

In their defense, rationally speaking, I would say that they have mistaken “character” with “mind-set“. There is absolutely nothing wrong with my character. You are hitting under the belt by saying that I have a shitty personality? Who gave you that right?!

Society, at large, is filled with such ignoramuses. Live and let live. But, the next being from the masses, to open their mouth and spew such words like “character” or “personality” is going to get a mouthful from me. That is for sure. It is not our character, it is something that we cannot cure… but over time, learn how to recognise possible recurring symptoms and prevent the severity of the waves of sadness and melancholy.

Character, they say… *pfft*.



Without a second thought, Lenny picked up a shard of broken glass – one of the many smithereens – from the marble-tiled floor. “Ouch!” she uttered as the sharp edges of the shard pierced her palm, drawing out little maroon droplets along the line of the cut. Lenny dropped the glass and licked them away with a sweep of her tongue.

It is over. The charade of a marriage is over. People were actually starting to believe that the wonderful union was true. Alas, it all fell apart just like the countless pieces of glass lying on the floor of Lenny’s bedroom. So much for an everlasting union. Their wedded bliss had only lasted two centuries. Yes, that is around the period of time before the male partner starts cheating on his wife.

All was going as they had planned. Logan and Nikki were having the time of their lives, spending every available moment with each other. In fact, just two nights ago, they went out to grab a bite -or two – at the local V Bar down the block, with Lenny. However, when Lenny proposed that they go for a movie, Logan and Nikki turned her down saying they had to be at other places. Lenny believed them and returned home with her partner after which he left, with a goodbye kiss on her forehead.

Waking up the following afternoon with a throbbing headache, as beings like her kind do, Lenny say that Logan was not in bed beside her. Slowly, she reached for her cell and dialed Nikki’s number. After a couple of short rings, she was connected to Nikki. Lenny asked if she knew where Logan was. Nikki said no and told Lenny that she was going to sleep in more.

“Call me if you see him!” Lenny exclaimed just before Nikki hung up the phone.

Nikki and Lenny have been best friends for three centuries. They were turned by the same Sire and that meant that they were related. Blood is thicker than water, as the old saying goes… Or not.

Logan left a trail of soft kisses down her neck. “Oof, you big oaf!” Nikki said as she playfully swatted his face away. “I think you should go,” she said, more firmly.

“Babe, you know we simply cannot keep up with this sneaking around. I wish we could spend more time together,” he said, pulling a sad face, making Nikki giggle.

“I know… but…” she trailed off, a distant look in her eyes.

That got his attention. Logan got up sideways, his left arm supporting the weight of his body. “But what?” he asked, his interest piqued.

“Would you ever drink the blood of another woman? We all know that females can only drink the blood of another female and the same applies to male vampires. You’re married to Lenny and that happened because you drank her blood. But now, you’re drinking mine,” she said, twirling the ends of her hair around her index finger. “Does that mean we’re married, since you’re feeding off me?”

“Nikki… Er… Why do you have to complicate things. I love you… and… Lenny..” Now it was his turn to have a distant look in his eyes.

“No, Logan, you love me. That’s why you keep coming back to me,” Nikki said.

Logan abruptly stood up from the bed and pulled his t-shirt over his body. “I have to go,” he continued as he passed Nikki’s dress to her, “You know Lenny comes before you… I have vowed to spend eternity with her… But I feed from you, too. Please, Nikki, give me some time.”

“Wait, Logan! Please come back to me! You can always stop living with her!” Nikki shouted as she tripped over her own dress, pursuing him.

“See you, Nikki,” he replied.

Logan drove into the front porch of my his house several minutes later. He took the keys out of the ignition, closed the door and walked up the stairs to see Lenny.

Lenny was surprised to see him, “Where did you go?” she questioned him. “You weren’t anywhere!”

Logan walked towards his wife and went to hug her. Startled by this show of affection, she laughed slightly and hugged him back. Her laughter was snatched away from her.

“Why is there… I must be mistaken… But no, I’m sure I’m not… Logan, why is there blood on your t-shirt?!” she screeched, “Tell me, where were you? Tell me this instant!”

“Sweetheart, I was no where…” he replied, trying to calm her down.

“Liar!” she screamed. She grabbed him by his arm and went closer. She licked the blood from his t-shirt and announced, incredulously, “Nikki?!”

Logan knew it was too late.

Lenny seized the closest thing she could get ahold of and hurled it at her husband. Logan dodged the glass and shielded his face with his arms.

Another glass flew, the aim getting sharper and sharper. There was a cut on his left cheek, but Logan was in no condition to feel the pain.

He ran out his house with his wife hot on his heels. Fumbling for a moment in his right trouser pocket for his car keys, he managed to get it out and opened the car door.

Stepping on the accelerator, Logan drove out of his house knowing that he’d never be forgiven. Greed had cost him his life.


Forbidden Love

Torrie let out a sigh as she slowly opened her eyes, eyelids fluttering like the dusty wings of a butterfly. Sunlight creeped into her room through the translucent green curtains of the room, reaching her as she pushed away the comforter of her bed, standing up.

Strong arms reached out from behind her and pulled her back into bed. “Tristan! You should go,” she said calmly as he caressed her shoulders, kissing her ears, gently running his teeth over her sensitive skin. She shivered with anticipation, but did nothing to stop him. “Stop!” she whispered loudly as he began to leave a trail of kisses down her back.

Hungrily, Torrie turned around and kissed him fiercely, wanting to devour him alive. She could feel the rhythmic beating of his heart against her own.They well aware that what they were doing was wrong. She was engaged to his best friend, David, with the wedding scheduled in just slightly over a week from now. It was very wrong.

His mouth swallowed her words, “Stop.”

He then wrapped his arms around her body as she trembled, turning into putty in his warm embrace.

“Tristan,” she began.

“Don’t, sweetheart,” He gently bit her full lower lip, drawing a bead of blood. He sucked her lip, drawing another shiver from her as she melted completely in his arms. Her eyes closed in sheer ecstasy, but her mind was divided between right and wrong.

“I need you!” she exclaimed softly into his hungry mouth. Torrie’s mind was still caught in its own war, but her body went weak and surrendered to his possessive hands. It was magic. He had cast a spell on her; that was why her will was caving in. “David…” her conscience said, but she pushed that thought aside.

“You’re mine now,” his tongue licked the pulsating vein in her neck.

His demanding hands pulled her dress up and away from her body. Tristan was filled with so much passion, but what made their scandalous union special was that there was so much love in it. “I love you,” she said as she shuddered against his strong body. It was beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loved her and she, in return, loved him.

Their kiss grew hungry and powerful and they could not fight this any longer. Tristan pulled away so he could look deeply into her eyes. Then his mouth was on hers again, and this time there was no turning back. He lowered himself against her, entering her swiftly, as his fangs pierced her neck, without any hesitation. She let out a scream and shuddered violently, wrapping her hands around his neck. He shook with need, his mouth on her neck. Recovering, he swept his tongue across the punctures and gently licked the broken skin, leaving no mark.

After a few minutes of them just lying on the bed, intertwined, relishing their union, Torrie started crying, pushing her lover away. Tristan reluctantly stopped what he was doing and pulled his t-shirt from underneath his pillow and pulled it down across his broad, tanned shoulders. He shot her a look of undeniable love as he stood up, unfurling himself till he stood in all his glor. He had warm eyes and a wicked dimple showed itself as he gave her a smile. “I should go. You’re right,” he conceded, already dressed now, walking out the bedroom door.

Torrie got up, covering her vulnerable body with the comforter, opposite from where he was, on the other side of the bed, desire, longing and tears in her eyes. “Guilt. You have to put an end to this,” her mind admonished her, “this is so very wrong!”

How can something so wrong feel so good? “I’m too weak,” she muttered to herself. With that she turned towards the windows and watched as her forbidden lover drive away from her house.


The Lost Love

Fury blazed in Raena’s eyes as they hurriedly flashed across the words that appeared on the screen. “What on earth?!” she thought. This is the third time she has seen something like this. Dumbfounded, she could not stop herself from reading the words. Beyond damage control, she made up her mind to confront her boyfriend about this.

“What on earth do you think you’re doing?” she yelled as she stalked out of her house, storming towards Alex who was out in the backyard watering the plants. “You honestly believe I would forgive you this time?” she asked, outraged and continued, “Who is that woman sending you those messages on the computer?”

Alex, thinking that it was another one of his girlfriend’s mood swings, carried on watering the plants. Sensing Raena was dead serious, he stopped what he was doing and turned around to face her and asked, “Why are you reading my personal messages?”

Raena, shell-shocked, replied, “We had an understanding, Alex. Have you forgotten that? This is the third time, Alex. Enough is enough. I want a break-up.”

Alex took a tentative step towards her. Dread filled his stomach and he whispered, “I’m sorry, baby. It means absolutely nothing. She was just another girl. I love you, you know that.”

Raena covered the space between them and stabbed her index finger at his chest. “This is exactly the man I know that you are. You’re a man fueled by passion and lies. I loved your passion, but I abhor your filthy lies. God, I was so naive to think that you’d change. You need help, Alex. I can’t let this slide by.”

Two minutes ticked by and she said all the while stabbing his chest with her finger. “Do you think I can’t do what you are doing? We’re grown adults. I am terribly hurt. I loved you once; forgave you twice; this is the third and final time. I’ve had enough, Alex. It’s over!”

With that declaration she turned to storm her way back to the house, but Alex swiftly stepped forward and grabbed her face with his hand. He held her cheeks together with his hand lightly, but his voice was determined. “We’re adults, baby. You belong to me. Me only. You. Belong. To. Me. Only,” he spoke each word calmly calmly, yet in a voice that was laced with fury.

Raena closed her eyes. She took a deep breath and pushed him away from her. “You are not frightening me. We’re over,” she cried, all the while standing rooted to the ground. She opened my eyes and stared into his eyes. “I was stupid enough to have believed that before.” She lifted her left hand, reached for the ring around her ring finger and twisted it off her finger and threw it at him.

“I do not belong to you, Alex. Not now. Not ever!” she said firmly.

Feeling numb to her core, Raena turned and walked off. She wiped away her tears and with a broken heart and will, she made a vow never to shed another tear for her lost love.


The Lost Bite

It all began a month ago – my first day at Redrop College. I joined the long queue for enrolment when she bounced up to me.

“Hey, there! My name is Nikita and I’m absolutely over the moon to have met you! On behalf of all the Student Leaders, I’d like to be the first to welcome you to Redrop College. Welcome!” she flashed a gleeful grin.

“Darn it. Another one of the chirpy ones?” I thought to myself, but I greeted her and said a thank you. This was one of the reasons I had to move college. I am what you would describe as a reserved person. I value my privacy but, yes, even then – in my previous college – I was a Student Leader. I know, I know, it may seem like a surprise, but coming to think of it, I am just glad to have moved places. Moving away from the prying eyes of vultures was a good idea. People were starting to whisper.

It all began a month ago – my first day at Redrop College. I joined the long queue for enrolment when she bounced up to me.

“Hey, there! My name is Nikita and I’m absolutely over the moon to have met you! On behalf of all the Student Leaders, I’d like to be the first to welcome you to Redrop College. Welcome!” she flashed a gleeful grin.

“Darn it. Another one of the chirpy ones?” I thought to myself, but I greeted her and said a thank you. This was one of the reasons I had to move college. I am what you would describe as a reserved person. I value my privacy but, yes, my situation was as such. I know it may seem like a surprise, but coming to think of it, I am just glad to have moved places. Moving away from the prying eyes of vultures was a good idea. People were starting to whisper.

“Hello, did you hear what I just said?” a voice pierced through my reverie. It was the same Student Leader.

“Yes, of course. Pardon me for day-dreaming. Thank you so much! I am just as excited to be in this college. Are you a senior?” I queried, just to keep the conversation going. In reality, I wish she would just skip by me and move on to someone else instead.

“You don’t want people getting suspicious, do you?” my mind asked. Of course not.

She bounced in front of me again and told me that she was indeed a senior Student Leader and that she would love to explore the college grounds with me when I was done with official enrolment.

My turn arrived and I supplied the admissions staff with my particulars, transcripts and all that jazz. ‘Tis done! I was now officially a freshman of Redrop College!

True enough, Nikita was waiting for me to complete my registration and she bounced up to me and took me by the arm and declared, “Let’s go!”

In all honesty, I just wanted this sprite to just leave me be. I am totally fine with exploring the college grounds by myself. I was not here to make friends! The last thing I wanted to do was make myself known to everyone in college; especially the Student Leaders. It was just Plus, what if could not control my hunger? That would royally mess up my college experience. Even then, necessity is the mother of invention, they say.

“Come on, I’ll show you around!” she exclaimed, grabbing my arm as if I was a new play-thing belonging to a child.

“Thank you,” I replied. With that, we were off to walk around the sprawling campus of the college. Frankly, it was sweltering hot and the sun was blazing in the skies above us. I just wanted to slip out of my black cardigan, but I knew I could not as I would easily suffer a sunburn. Contrary to popular belief, people like me do not burst into flames or perish into dust when under sunlight, but, hey, I was not there to prove anyone wrong.

“I’m Varsen,” I offered, and continued, “I am glad to have met you. I have something… something to ask you, if you don’t mind. What are the people like in this college?” I asked tentatively.

“Oh, hello, Varsen! Glad you told me your name, I was starting to wonder. Yes, Redrop College is one of the premiere colleges in this neighbourhood and we only accept the deserving. As for the people… well, that’s an odd question,” Nikita said, looking at me with curious eyes.

“Damn, don’t blow it,” my mind cautioned. “Of course not, I was merely curious,” I assured her. The next thing I knew, she returned to her chirpy personality and showed me around campus.

The next two weeks flew by in a blur with Nikita by my side when she had the time. For the life of me, I could not see what it was about me that made her stick around. I mean, she had so many other friends before I came along and it was not like I had even half an inch as much spirit as she had.

“Hey, Varsen! Do you maybe want to grab a bite to eat or something tonight?” she asked, bouncing up in front of me.

I smiled to myself. The irony of her words! A “bite” indeed. I mentally kicked myself for that thought. I would not take a bite from anyone! However, I just might bite someone. It has been sometime since I last fed. I rarely feed on humans, like Nikita, and coming to think of it, the need for real food was urgent. The life of cats had been the primary source of sustenance all along. I had to stop that… People were starting to whisper here, too.

Not wanting to blow my cover, I had to keep a straight face and accede to her request. Suppressing a laugh, I asked “Like a date, you mean?”

“Well, yeah. But only if you want to…” she replied. For the first time, I was drawn to the pulsating nerve on the left side of her neck. “A date… indeed…” the thought squirmed in my head. She shook me. “Are you alright?” she asked, concerned.

I nodded my head and said, “Sure, I quite enjoy your company.” It was really silly of me to have agreed but I arranged to meet her at the pizza place near the college at seven that evening.

I say foolishly because I was on a different kind of diet as compared to the rest of the students –no junk food of any kind for me. Even then, cats were, to me, considered to be junk food. It was high time I had some real food!

We were the last ones left in the shop. The meet-up was going well and of course, as far as I was concerned, I only had one real intent in my mind. I would not call it a date as we were clearly on different wavelengths! She wanted to “hang out”, whereas I, on the other hand, was trying to go for a bite!

It took me the strength of a steel gut to hold down the ham and cheese pizza and a glass of cranberry juice I had merely poked at and sipped. Before I knew it, Nikita bounced over to my side and started hugging me. I was so confused that I initially pushed her away. I liked her – of course I did – and the pulsating vein in her neck drew me closer towards her.

Rationally speaking, I should have never let it get this far, but when she slipped off her zippered hoodie and tilted her head to the right side, I lost control. My innate instinct yelled at me to stop. My deeper, darker instinct told me to do what I had to do. I felt powerless at such a command from deep within.

I knew that she was not aware of who I really was,. But when she did that… she was luring me to feed on her. I collapsed and gave in. I was overwhelmed by the desire to drain the living blood out of an innocent girl all because she was flirting with me. I could not stop. I had let our kiss go too far.

Without the shadow of a doubt as to what I had to do, I drove my sharp canines into her neck, gently piercing the skin, drawing out just enough blood. I immediately used my tongue and soothed the area with my saliva, which had healing as well as numbing effect.

When the blood is leaving the body of any victim they tend to feel a sense of comfort. They do not feel the death in a painful way. However, to end her life was never my intent. I merely wanted to… taste her.

Most of my kind, back in the previous college I was in, would have felt utterly no remorse or guilt; but not me. I knew I had to stop. Even then, my body was screaming at me to drink and drink. I had gone two weeks without properly feeding myself.

“Enough!” my mind ordered. With all the will and conscience I had, I licked the puncture wounds on her neck and held her tightly as I walked out of the pizza place.

There was nothing I could do to help her gain conscience. The least I could do was to make it as much painless as I could. Leaving her almost lifeless on the steps outside the shop was undoubtedly one of the hardest things I had ever been compelled to do.

“I will never…” my thoughts wandered. I regained my strength and had to escape this place as fast as I could. I had just drunk the blood of a Student Leader, and if she goes missing, I will be in deep shit. Knowing that she will not have any inkling of a memory of what had just transpired between us, I took run. Never did I look back.

There she laid lifeless, on the dark, dimly-lit steps outside the shop, with two puncture wounds on the left side of her neck, where my sharp fangs had left their deadly marks.



Feel these words that run through my veins
No one wants to heal this broken heart
From a heavy heart these words flow
So many things I have kept inside
So many things I have forgotten
Forgotten faces forgotten times
Let time heal my wounds
Words that do not mean anything to anyone
I do not care if these words rhyme
Damn if they do
Damn if they do not
Here I am lying on my bed
Wondering if a momentous moment has passed
Which I will never get a chance to change
Things I have missed
Things I wish I had missed
This is the way life plays out
Full of wasted words
Full of wasted years.